When novices are learning to communicate with spirit people they often hand over their control and expect the visiting spirit to know what to do. They wait, expectant, hoping the spirit will divulge mysteries and speak with them.
A conversation is a two way process though and rather than think of a spirit as a dead entity, a wisp of something intangible, why not think of them as a living being, a person, with character and thoughts and feelings? Thinking that way will ensure that you have no fear of them, you will not see them as a frightening entity or shrink away from them when they come close. They are just people, like you and I. Work with love and compassion for the best results. They don't want to hurt you but sometimes they come too close or invade your body a little too strongly and it can frighten the novice.
Don't be afraid to take control and tell the spirit visitor what you expect to happen. Set your boundaries as far as what you want to do and what you will not do and how far they are allowed to get into you.
Set up the meetings so that you know who is around you. You can even ask for spirit to approach you on the right hand side for example if they are female and on the left hand side for male or if related or not, or for which side of the family they come from for instance. You have the power to make your readings and communions successful. Spirit don't always know what to do or how you work because they come into contact with many mediums and they all work in different ways with varying levels of vibration.
Communion is communication and will not be successful if one of you is passive. All mediums have had a spirit person come to them who is hard to work with and has little to say, if that happens to you, take control, ask questions of them, get them to comply with your way of working and if they wont do that then tell them politely to go. You do get time wasters in the spirit world just as you do here in the earthly environment!